The Third Ear Conflict Resolution process is based on transformative mediation processes that are especially helpful in settings where the parties need to maintain a relationship in some form. Among other things, employers use it to diffuse situations in which co-workers’ personality conflicts are delaying projects or missteps have broken trust.
Listen with Your Heart
When you look in the center of the English word for corazon, herz, or coeur, there it is: h-E-A-R-t.
Your third ear is in your heart. Not literally, of course. But this simple concept and the Third Ear logo are intended to remind you to slow down when you are emotionally charged. Look beyond the obvious for the fear, pain, and human vulnerabilities in people, even when they are yelling at you. Listen for the hurts you can heal. This will make you a more effective problem-solver–at work and at home.
When emotions go up, intelligence goes down. ~ Robert Kiyosaki
Confront High Emotions Effectively
The Third Ear Resolution process is a two-part process. The Seven Choices help you reconnect with your more rational, intellectual side so you will be better able to identify solutions when you involve others in the process. You can, of course, repeat them as necessary throughout the process.
The Seven Choices:
- Forgive yourself
- Acknowledge yourself
- Forgive the world
- Free the emotions
- Clear your mind
- Assume you know nothing
- Listen with your third ear
Collaborate with Any Willing Participant
The Five Actions are typically taken with the other person or people affected by the conflict. We clearly define the conflict from each person’s perspective, identify each person’s interests in the conflict, and play with a full range of possibilities for resolution. Once we have some specific, measurable actions each person can take, we can begin to create a new future for everyone.
The Five Actions:
- Define the conflict succinctly
- Identify each party’s interests
- Play with the possibilities for resolution
- Create the future with a specific, actionable plan
- Stay on PARR: Planning, Acting, Revising, and Repeating, until you get the desired results
