I forgive you

for not being tall

and thin

and blonde.

I forgive you

for looking like him,

having his genes

and hers

which make you more susceptible to certain diseases and ailments.

I know you want love

just like I do

and are confused

that your best qualities aren’t seen as enough.

Even by me.

I sometimes love you for your athleticism,

his smile,

her laughter,

and your combination of the parents we never knew together,

except as they occur in you

and her

and her.

At other times,

I blame you

and them

for the parts of my life that don’t work.

It’s a convenient excuse

for being tired,




poor, or


You’ve always been with me,

yet changing,

sometimes more rapidly than I can keep up,

and too slowly when I want you to be

anything but me.

Nance L. Schick, Esq. is an attorney, mediator, and conflict resolution coach based in New York City. She is the founder of The Law Studio of Nance L. Schick, where she and her team of employees, vendors, and strategic partners deconstruct conflict and re-create it as opportunity, using a holistic, integrative approach. Nance resolves conflict and cultivates leaders, using her EEOC training, as well as her proprietary Third Ear Conflict Resolution process, which is described in more detail in her first book, DIY Conflict Resolution: Seven Choices and Five Actions of a Master. She is also an award-winning entrepreneur, who has been acknowledged by the New York Economic Development Corporation/B-Labs (Best for NYC 2015 finalist), U.S. Chamber of Commerce (2015 Blue Ribbon Small Business), Enterprising Women Magazine (Honorable Mention, 2014 Woman of the Year awards), and Urban Rebound NY/Count Me In (2013 Pitch Competition finalist).